Tag Archives: video game review

Dangerous Golf and Jackass

dangaerousgolf1

“There’s a touch of innocent social consciousness to the work. Dangerous Golf ribs America’s food obsession by staging scenarios in stocked kitchens. Australian levels exist in a deserted gas station, the only landmark for miles. France-based challenges impart their snooty admiration for fine art and museums. The British show off their castles, stocked with suits of armor, lit by stained glass. It’s quaint, a bit of friendly joking with national stereotypes. ”

Read my full feature on Dangerous Golf via Playboy

Leave a comment

Filed under Video Game Reviews

On Nathan Drake and Uncharted 4

Uncharted 4: A Thief’s End™_20160511134839

There’s a normal life to consider. This is where Drake resides during his time off. Reaching near death in the deserts of Uncharted 3 must have slowed his adventurous sense, forcing him to reconsider what matters. He now dives for treasure as part of a salvage company. A video game protagonist with a playable day job—how odd. The Mario Bros. may be plumbers, but they’ve never unclogged a residential toilet in-game.

Read my full feature on Uncharted 4 on Playboy

Leave a comment

Filed under Video Game Reviews

The Division (PS4) Review

Tom Clancy's The Division™_20160310183658

“A vocal computer AI calls out bad people as targets. Markers aim predominantly at people in hoodies, UbiSoft socially blind to the real world stigmas they’re perpetuating. Then they make The Division’s government-led vigilantes equally villainous. Men in hoodies are killed for looting dead bodies; Division members loot their victim’s corpses. No one comments on the ethical paradox.”

Read my full review of The Division at Review ‘Em All

Leave a comment

Filed under Video Game Reviews

Plants vs Zombies: Garden Warfare 2 (PS4) Review

Plants vs Zombies GW2_20160224191849

Garden Warfare’s sequel is $60, runs on the technical background of EA’s multi-million dollar Battlefield series, needs a $300 console or super charged gaming PC, and has no tutorial. After five hours of play, it’s still unclear what Garden Warfare 2’s stars are for. Being connected online for a thin solo campaign, you cannot pause – you play when EA says you can. You can’t play on your bathroom break because you’re not allowed a bathroom break.

This is PopCap’s output now.”

Read my full Garden Warfare 2 review at Review ‘Em All

Leave a comment

Filed under Video Game Reviews

Need for Speed Defines the Internet Generation

Need for Speed™_20151105122544

“Every driver is trying to stand out. They’re drifting through events, breaking time challenges; whatever is needed to be noticed. The culture feels crowded, racers bumping into one another for a chance to be seen or skim even a small fragment of fame. Races are less about who wins than they are about whose showmanship would rank higher in views. Need for Speed is a clean metaphor for internet content (and probably by total accident).”

Read my full thoughts on Need for Speed at Playboy

Leave a comment

Filed under Features

On Rainbow Six Siege

Tom Clancy's Rainbow Six® Siege_20151202145133

“By excising a narrative (Siege is stuck almost entirely online) UbiSoft insists they’re avoiding politicization. Instead, it’s the opposite. They’ve turned suburban shootouts nameless and faceless. Terrorists wear masks so they cannot be identified. Victims are as ignored as they are in mainstream media. Brief video interstitial segments note “orders and protocols are irrelevant,” a powerful line which in five words frames much of American police saga.”

Read my full review of Rainbow Six Siege on Medium

Leave a comment

Filed under Video Game Reviews

Yo-Kai Watch (3DS) Review

yokaiwatch3

“To an extent, Yo-Kai Watch does speak down to a specific level of pre-pubescent immaturity. That’s okay. Lessons are universal. If a Yokai named Snotsolong (with its bouncing nasal debris acting as a weapon) is able to help a child cope, so be it. There are other low grade teachings too. Don’t cross a road when the lights are red or you will be scolded by ghost compatriot Whisper. Again, Yo-Kai Watch can overcome the Asian origins by being practical.”

Read my full review of Yo-Kai Watch at GameSkinny

Leave a comment

Filed under Video Game Reviews

Rise of the Tomb Raider (Xbox One) Review

Thu_Nov_12_17-44-47_EST_2015

“If there exists a single mainstream video game (and it is certainly alone as a console exclusive) which acts as a reflection of modern society, it is Rise of the Tomb Raider. While not an encompassing portrait, the exaggerated narrative is an unforgiving interpenetration of media flare ups over Kentucky license clerks, school prayer, and what some view as religious persecution. Konstatin has no greater purpose other than enacting what he sees as God’s will – he’s the Westboro Baptist Church of the scenario. It’s a loaded sentiment and displayed without sensitivity toward prejudiced conservatism.”

Read my full review of Rise of the Tomb Raider at GameSkinny

Leave a comment

Filed under Video Game Reviews

Call of Duty: Black Ops III (PS4) Review

Call of Duty®: Black Ops III_20151108124848

“Clues mean torture, which is okay because the results lead to more shoot-outs. In trying to convince an audience that torture is reasonable, dialog piles on eye-rolling commentary: “Besides, he’s an f’n terrorist,” seconds before hemorrhaging the victim’s brain. Everything must be approached in a blockbuster, low attention span theater way. Black Ops III turns itself sideways trying to expose the possible cost of not torturing – the loss of 300,000 people in a cataclysmic explosion could have been stopped if only we suffocated more people beforehand.

Fear still works, only now instead of an inconvenience at the airport, people are paying $60 for the privilege of seeing their fears justified.”

Read my full review of Call of Duty: Black Ops III at GameSkinny

Leave a comment

Filed under Video Game Reviews

Halo 5 Guardians (Xbox One) Review

Sun_Nov_1_11-56-30_EST_2015

“Through progression, it would appear the interesting layers of the universe – gripping religious fanaticism and necessity of war – are being excised for a playable essay against progressive technology. Halo is stepping into Isaac Asimov and Arthur C. Clarke’s territory. What was once so unique has fallen into the derivative and intellectually stymied.”

Read my full review of Halo 5 Guardians at GameSkinny

Leave a comment

Filed under Video Game Reviews